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“No I haven’t,” I explained. “I did it to prove that the whole idea is preposterous. How
can a section of linoleum floor in a school basement suddenly become sacred? And
when does the linoleum go back to being NOT sacred? The Girl Scouts shouldn’t be
teaching superstition!”
another girl and another. By the time our mothers got there I was the only one not
time?” And I stated proudly, “I was helping my fellow scouts, doing them a favor by
crying. With a great sigh of resignation my mother asked me, “What did you do this
time?” And I stated proudly, “I was helping my fellow scouts, doing them a favor by
telling them the truth!” And my mom said, “When are you going to learn if you don’t
can sew my lips shut right now.”
have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all?” And I said, “Fine. Then you
can sew my lips shut right now.”
Over the years I’ve never been able to stop being opinionated, but I have learned to
keep more of my (possibly extreme) opinions to myself. That way nobody gets hurt.
Not me, not the person or organization I’m criticizing. Which brings me to Stephan
Pastis who recently revealed in his strip Pearls Before Swine his negative opinion of
Sally and Ted Forth (and Sally in particular). What did Sally Forth ever do to Pastis?
And why does he suggest Ted should cheat on her?
If I knew Pastis I would say to him, “From one extremely opinionated person to
another – keep it to yourself. You can think it, but you can’t say it. Even if you were
right about it, which you were not, nobody will like you for saying it because, face it, it’
s just not nice! And Stephan, since you brought up the subject, why do you think
Sally is an ‘emasculator?’ Because after Ted got fired he spent the next 6 months
moping around the house in a bathrobe and never lifted a finger while Sally brought
home the bacon? Was this the emasculating thing that Sally did?!
you!” you!”
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